The St. Peter in Me

I recently read this reflection in the book Kisses from Katie.

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Peter is the rock on which God built His Church.  But first, Peter was probably the worst disciple ever.  I am Peter.

Jesus tell Peter that he (Peter) will deny Him 3 times; Peter says, "No! I love you, I could never deny you, Lord."  Yet we all know that Peter does in fact deny Jesus three times.  I know in my heart and my soul and the core of my being that I love the Lord, that I would do anything for him, go to the ends of the earth for him, but how often do I forget to give the glory to his name?  How often do I take compliments without giving him the credit?  Do I, like Peter, deny Jesus the glory that is his?

Jesus told his disciples that it was God's will for him to be arrested.  He went willingly when the soldiers came to take him, but enthusiastic, loving Peter raised his sword and cut off a soldier's ear.  "Put your sword away," Jesus commanded.  "Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?"  I am Peter.  I have my own time frame.  When I don't see things happening, I try to make them happen.  And Jesus says, "Put away your sword, put away your plans.  Shall we not do what the Father has asked of us?" So like Peter, I put away my plans, my defenses, and watch as everything happens perfectly, in God's own timing.

After Jesus had risen, He appeared to His disciples while they were fishing.  When Peter saw his beloved Savior, he excitedly jumped out of the boat and began swimming to where Jesus stood.  Needless to say, the boat probably reached the shore long before Peter.  I am Peter -- excitedly jumping into things and then standing, sopping wet, at the feet of the Lord, smiling at my stupidity.  I get excited, forget to think things through, and end up doing them the long way.  Every time, though, just as with Peter, Jesus welcomes my soaking wet self into his arms and is simply happy to see me.

I am Peter who made many mistakes, but I am Peter for whom God had great plans, whom God established to do his work.  Peter is the rock on which Jesus built his Church.  The very night when Peter foolishly jumped out of the boat, Jesus reinstated him in the presence of the other disciples.

"Do you truly love me?" He asked.  "Then feed my lambs."

"Do you really love me?  Take care of my lambs."

"Peter, do you love me?  Feed my sheep, and come follow me."

For each time I deny God the glory that is his, for each time I follow my will instead of listening to his, for each time I jump ahead without first consulting my Lord, he asks, "Daughter, do you truly love me?" and I do.

"Feed my sheep."  And I will.  And I do.

"Come follow me."  And I am, at least I am trying.

I am Peter.  I mess up.  I make mistakes, I am far from perfect, and God will use me.  God will establish great things through me.

You are Peter.  God already knows that you will make a mess, but his plan for you is great.

Go.  Feed his sheep.