That Love Holiday

In just a few days, that holiday will be here. You know. The one about chocolates and flowers and romance.

Or is that what it's about?

I've always had mixed feelings about Valentine's Day. I really get into all the lace and hearts and anything pink. It's very feminine and festive, you know?

Yet sometimes I'm bothered by the secular celebration of the holiday. The way lust and emotions are focused on rather than sacrificial love and commitment. The way single men and women are left in the dust to struggle with loneliness, heartache, or jealousy. And let's not forget about the commercialism! I heard somewhere recently that the average American couple spend $126 on each other for Valentine's Day! Are you serious?!

Despite how costly Valentine's Day can be for that average American couple, I'm convinced

that we've cheapened love.

Because tonight when I look up at the crucifix above my bed, I see the truest sign of love I've ever known. And that gift of love didn't cost the Man a cent.

But it did cost His life.

No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. (John 15:13)

Ladies, my prayer for you this Valentine's Day is that you know and experience Christ's love for you in a deeply personal way this year. I cannot emphasize enough that He knows you so deeply and intimately and He loves you in a way you've never been loved before, a way you can't begin to comprehend. A way that fills you and completes you and satisfies you.

Take a moment to allow that to sink in. Even if you know it. Because every single one of us can't reflect on that truth enough.

And after we receive that love and allow it to fill our hearts to overflowing...He does ask one thing of us.

Love one another as I love you. (John 15:12)

I know some of you have husbands and boyfriends and fiancees this week. I know some of you are aching for a special man in your life--and oh, how I understand, sweet sisters! I've been there! I know some of you have taken the Lord as your spouse in religious life--or will someday. But every one of us--no matter our vocation--is called to receive the love of our God and to share it with others.

Maybe that means buying a bouquet of flowers for a friend who just went through a breakup. Maybe that means sending a card in the mail to an eldery shut-in from your parish. Maybe that means sitting in an Adoration chapel just letting God love on you. Maybe that means treating your boyfriend with purity, as a precious child of God. Maybe that means holding back the complaint on the tip of your tongue when your husband gets home late from work.

That love holiday is coming up this week. Let's show the world what real love looks like--and point them to the One who first showed us.

[And while we're celebrating love and Valentine's Day and all that...why don't you stop by Catholic Young Woman on February 14th and sign up for our very first book giveaway?!]

Steadfast

I sat on the beautiful second-story balcony with my friend K. at the bed-and-breakfast. Dusk was quickly settling on the peaceful Amish hillside. There were no lights for miles, just farmland and barns and white farmhouses in this sweet country of the Plain people.

I unzipped my Bible cover and opened the Word. There was peace in my surroundings but inwardly my heart was hurt and confused and unsettled.

K. had listened to me tearily relay that morning a struggle in my relationship. Misunderstanding. Uncertainty. Tension. (The perfectionist in me hates the messiness in human relationships...but the redeemed child of God in me reminds me that it's okay not to be perfect as long as we belong to the One who is...and that He's pretty amazing at redeeming the messiness).

I opened to Chapter 1 in James. I knew it well--all about doubt and being tossed like waves on the ocean. Yes, this one was fitting for us. Though I don't want to share details, there was some pride in my wounded heart as I chose this chapter tonight. These words were for him, not for me, I thought.

I should know by now that when we read His Word, He usually wants to talk to us...not about other people.

Instead of going right to verse 6 about faith and doubt and such, I started at the beginning. And I felt His Voice deep in my heart, comforting and instructing.

"Count it all joy, my brethren, when you meet various trials, for you know that the the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." (James 1:2-4)

Count it all joy.

The testing of your faith produces steadfastness.

Let steadfastness have its full effect.

Steadfastness.

That word kept echoing in my mind and heart. I wasn't loving him steadfastly. I was loving him conditionally. I wasn't loving him like Christ loves us--constantly, unconditionally. Steadfastly. This was my call. I heard it in my heart as clearly as if He had spoken it from heavens in the clear, starry sky tonight. Not to mull over the details of the messiness. Not to worry or to figure things out or to place blame. But to love. Always to love. As Jesus does. He says that this testing of my faith would help produce that kind of steadfast love in me. And choosing to love steadfastly would in turn "have its full effect," which may not be a change in the situation...but a change in me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He does transform the messiness. Time and time again. So today, months later, as I find myself getting discouraged and in another trial, I remind myself to count it all joy.

And as I catch up with a few friends' blogs on this cozy Sunday afternoon, a little verse sticks out to me at the bottom of my friend Christine's post...James 1:2-4. Thank you, Lord. You always know just what I need.